Tom Petty's "Don't Do Me Like That" came on the radio as I was driving home thinking about what one beautiful woman had said to me just recently at an Atlanta swing club. Basically, she said, "I just want to fuck you." I'm pretty sure every straight guy has wanted to say that AND/OR have it said to them, but most guys I know wouldn't come right out and say it. I started thinking about the song that was playing and "Just Do Me Like That" comes to mind.
So, I got home and wrote this "parody" in like 5 minutes. If you know my sense of humor and like it, you'll love this.
If you don't know the song, you may be offended. It was not meant in that way at all, the words just fit so well.
Just Do Me Like That
2007 Year of the Cock Music
(guess I have to stop writing year of the monkey on my checks!)
I was talkin' with this guy I know
Said one of Gods' laws has got a loophole
A girl walked up to him, said to take her from behind
Then she drops to her knees and blows his mind
Every straight guy has fantasized
Just want to sleep with them, not hear them whine
You ain't breakin' any rules from above
When her husband hands you your glove!
Just do me like that. Just do me like that
I just don't need you baby
Just do me like that. Just do me like that
Just do me like that
I know I don't need you baby
Just do me like that.
Listen honey, can't you see? It just wouldn't bother me
If we were at a swingers club and you want some other guy
Just a little warning so remind yourself
You just might see me with someone else
I just don't need you baby
Just do me like that.
Just do me like that. Just do me like that
I just don't love you baby
Just do me like that. Just do me like that
I know I don't love you honey
Just do me like that.
'Cause somewhere deep down inside
Some other girl will be sayin'
No man ever lasts that long!
You said it last night
when you couldn't stop screamin
'
I dont think I can take anymore!
Listen honey, can't you see? It just wouldn't bother me
If you were at a swingers club taking on four or five
Just a little warning so remind yourself
You know I won't be by myself
She opened up my eyes
And brags about my size
Just do me like that. Just do me like that
I just don't love you baby
Just do me like that. Just do me like that
I know I don't need you honey
Just do me like that